If I had to describe my Bliss it would go something like this...I would be a Mompreneur, working from home on projects I love: writing, photography, adding content to my podcast, creating at home movement programs to help parents who have kids with mobility challenges, meeting kids in nature, and helping kids of all abilities connect through experiences and empower them all to go confidently in the direction of their dreams. I would do this from home, while unschooling/world schooling/natural homeschooling my son in the most integrated way possible. I would find a rhythm in my home that included family movement (something like yoga), outside exploration time, adventure days, family meals, dance parties, and just living in harmony. I would find the best integration possible where we are all free to choose and collaborate how we make money, what we spend our money on and how and where we spend our time. I just never knew I’d have the opportunity/be forced to figure this out due to a pandemic and the government closing down schools, work, travel, and basically everything considered “non-essential” to life as we know it.
Like most of you out there, I have a million things going through my head, nearly all of the contradictory. This is going to pass. This may last for a year. This is in the best interest of all of us. This is making me a crazy person. This time at home is a great opportunity to declutter and connect with my family. This time at home feels like prison. I am so lucky to still have my job. I wish I didn’t have to work from home. I really miss my friends and family…that one holds true. I really and truly miss hugging, seeing and spending time with those people whom I consider my family, but who do not live with me. Social media is helping me connect. Social media is making me want to throw my phone out the window. I’m so lucky I have toilet paper... wait, that one actually, I just don’t get. Why is toilet paper the thing people need to feel comfort through this? I was sure when I ordered my chocolate lava cake from our local grocery delivery service, that it would be out. But nope! I could have as many as I wanted. Comfort? That is chocolate to me so thank goodness I differ from most of the world on that one!
Honestly, most days I am not sure how I feel. I keep thinking, I have always asked for this. I have always wanted the opportunity to do all of those positive things listed above and in my Bliss description. The problem is, I didn’t want to have it because of a global health pandemic and out of fear. Because if I am really honest, there is true fear at the core of me. I am fearful of my son’s physical and mental health through this. I am worried about all the kids and families I work with who have multiple underlying health conditions. I am worried about the thousands of people I don’t know who are losing loved ones, their jobs, and so much more. I am scared and I am lucky, and I can be both. I can tell myself and others how lucky we are to have x, y, and z when others seem to be losing everything. Yet that doesn’t mean I can’t be scared. I can be healthy, at home, with food on the table and a normal amount of toilet paper left, and I can still be scared.
I’ve decided to write again to not only give myself an outlet and a voice in the midst of all of this, but to connect with all of you that may be trying to hold it all together, or showing the world you are holding it together because you are “privileged,” but that it is ok to find some way to let it all out. To realize your fears, concerns, or craziness are also ok to feel and are valid.
I have literally never seen my community so nice and welcoming in all the years I have lived here. The good in people that I always knew was there, is now shining bright for so many people to see in the smallest ways. There is no better time than now to see that the true meaning of life...is love. If you aren’t nice to someone in times like these, then you’re basically just an asshole. However, I have not yet met that asshole. People are smiling, people are getting outside, people are helping people even when they are scared too. If I can do anything to simply connect with people, near and far, through an online format, then that is what I choose to do to keep my head high and my stress low.
Connection is something we can all do. Even if you are living alone, or with a family who is driving you nuts, remember to use the phone or video chat with someone who can make you smile or laugh. Or better yet, who you can make smile and laugh. A big virtual hug is being sent out to every one of you.
-Kathryn Kraft, MPT
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